Wednesday, 14 April 2010

"I needed a job and then I got a job and heaven knows I’m miserable now."

I can’t help thinking Morrissey wrote that after spending some time in a call center.

My day today started with a twenty minute pitch on the wonders of the credit card.
The chap I was trying to sell it too, who had seemed at first quite interested, started laughing.

“Don’t need one of em” He said.

“Can I ask why not?” I said in my best salesperson voice.

“Cos I’m drunk and in a wheelchair” He cackled and then hung up.

I wasn’t quite sure which of these two things didn’t allow him to have a credit card. My boss certainly didn’t think this was a good enough excuse either and made me stand up until I made a sale. I felt like I was in year three, standing on a chair with my hands on my head after being caught covering my arms in PVA glue so I could let it dry and peel it off.

The rest of the day didn’t go much better. The next guy who answered started yelling at me.

“Why don’t you get a real fucking job?” He spat down the receiver.

I wanted to tell him this was the best I could do with a music degree in a recession but I didn’t and after he hung up I ticked the call back later button.
To get me through the rest of the day I made lists. I started with the top three Smiths albums.

1) The sound of The Smiths
2) The best of The Smiths
3) Singles The Smiths

But of course this is cheating.

I wonder why The Smiths have so many albums with the same songs on them? Maybe it was too make sure they made enough money so they would never have to get proper jobs again. Can’t say I blame them.


  1. Didn't I see you guys playing at the student union last month?

  2. Hahahahaha awesome I love the Smiths :) good blog x